Menopause - When the Rhythm of the Body Changes

For a long time, I didn’t think perimenopause had really touched me. Menopause, on the other hand, arrived all at once like a violent storm. But with hindsight, I could see how “peri” had quietly been moving through my body for years.

I turned fifty with celebration and lightness, a beautiful birthday enjoyed with many. Even the awful weather didn’t dampen the atmosphere. Days later, a trip to India that felt like a blessing - colour, heat, smell, devotion, stillness all at once. I came home feeling renewed.

It would take time before I understood what those prior years had done to me. A kind of weight you don’t measure on scales. Grief. Pressure. Responsibility. Loss layered upon loss. A faithful pet. A beloved mother. A not-so-faithful partner, a promise broken and a stepson lost. A business that needed rebuilding in an economy that did not feel ‘kind’. A life I had redirected and reshaped more than once before, now felt too hard to do-over.

I told myself it was just life and I did what I have always done when things get tough - I kept myself occupied. I found myself a new project or three. But this time, it felt harder. What I didn’t yet have was the language for what was shifting beneath the surface. Hormones that were changing, again - in a distant yet familiar, unsettling way. Oestrogen had been fluctuating long before it rapidly dropped. My nervous system was already stretched, and my body was struggling to adapt to its new internal environment.

When my last period arrived after returning from India, it was light, almost gentle, completely the opposite to the past 10 years. Then that was it. No more. Ahhh I thought, how apt. I was ready.

Within weeks, the first hot flush came. Not a gentle warmth, but a full-body surge of heat. Sweat pouring. Breath catching. I was on a first - and last - date when it happened too. I remember thinking he must think I’m terribly nervous. I wasn’t. It was just mid-life biology. Flushes became hourly and sleep vanished. Exhaustion crept in alongside embarrassment.

During the height of COVID, when wearing masks was normal, they became a strange kind of protection. I could hide behind them and no one saw how unmoored I felt inside. The anxiety. The low mood. The lack of confidence. The brain fog. The sense that something fundamental had shifted, and the way forward was very unclear to me.

In the initial menopause years, I resisted HRT (or MHT as it is now called). I carried fear from old research that should never have been released or held such authority. And so, I wanted to do everything “naturally”. Supplements. Protocols. Willpower.

Around this time of compounded stress - natural disasters, fear, global uncertainty, and my own private overload - I reached a moment that actually frightened me. Not because I truly wanted to leave this life, but because I questioned its purpose, its meaning and my place within it. The intensity I felt not knowing that answer was enough to know I needed help. I swung between over-empathetic to bone-chillingly numb. And, most worryingly, joyless.

I saw my Doctor and due diligence was done. Bloods. Breasts. Cervix. A clean bill of health and a base line established for future refence.

When I started on HRT, the change started gently. Within days, the heaviness began to shift. Low mood lifted. Anxiety softened. The constant bracing dissolved. I recognised myself again. Not the younger me - but the steadier me. The confident me. The sharper me.

As further dose adjustments occurred, and mental symptoms disappeared, the physical symptoms soon followed. Flushes eased and night sweats stopped. Sleep returned to normal. My brain began to function clearly again, and brain fog reduced. What I had learnt then was something no one was teaching us, nor had many Drs twigged onto - that many of the symptoms labelled as anxiety or depression in midlife are often, most likely, hormonal in origin.

Somewhere along the way, I noticed another change too. I found that I no longer had the same patience for cushioning truths or micro-managing everyone else’s feelings. I no longer bent myself into quite so many shapes to keep the peace. I also stopped the need to explain myself. Later, I learned that this too has a biological basis. As oestrogen changes, the brain eases its grip on constant social smoothing and self-monitoring women are known for. Energy becomes more precious and we become more selective with where we spend it, and with whom.

As my internal landscape steadied, my skin began to respond in an entirely different way too. At this stage of life, skin no longer responds well to intensity, but to replenishment - to being deeply hydrated, to having natural lipids restored, to the quiet guidance skin-loving vitamins and peptides provide to support repair without strain. The focus moves away from correction and toward protection, from driving change to allowing restoration.

What did not resolve so easily was my relationship with weight and metabolism. Before menopause, my body was forgiving. Firm. Fit. Fine. Afterwards, it became a different conversation entirely. Exercise became harder as joints stiffened and injuries accumulated. Blood pressure changed. Metabolism altered appetite, and a second glass of wine crept in as comfort during long evenings. But slowly, my attention turned to something I had completely underestimated - the gut connection.

Our gut does not simply digest food. It processes hormones. It shapes inflammation. It speaks continuously with the liver, the immune system, the brain and the skin. As oestrogen declines, microbial balance shifts. Liver clearance changes. What once ‘passed through’ with ease begins to linger. Weight becomes harder to shift. Skin becomes drier. Muscles weaken more quickly. Recovery slows.

What helped most in the beginning was not discipline, but consistency. Feeding the gut with fibre and fermentation rather than restriction. Supporting the microbiome so oestrogen could be metabolised and cleared rather than recycled. Letting the liver do its quiet work without asking it to process excess alcohol at the same time. These were small changes, but they allow the whole system to breathe again. And it was here, that my body started to catch its breath. To gently prod it into further action, calorie adjustments were next and easier to do than it would have

been.

With time, my skin readjusted too. What had once been dry and reactive under masks of sweat and stress, began to stabilise. Hydration held. The barrier strengthened. Treatments needed to be slower now, with longer recovery. At this stage of life, stimulation must be measured because the skin is thinner and the repair cycle slower.

And finally, when I allowed space into my life, everything shifted again. Time in the garden. Quiet mornings. Writing. Slowing the pace of work without losing my purpose. Choosing rest without guilt allowed my nervous system to emerge from survival mode at last. Peace.

Menopause took me inward before it allowed me to step forward again.

Sadly, as little as 5 years ago there was limited information to prepare women for this stage of life. The physical changes are confronting. The emotional shifts destabilise identity. The mirror becomes unfamiliar. Confidence wavers. And yet beneath all of it, the body is not failing us. It is reorganising, it is recalibrating.

What this season quietly taught me is that, at midlife, the body asks first for stability, nourishment and a return to rhythm before it can ever offer change. What I did not expect though was that after all that turbulence, a steadiness, a balance, would

eventually come. A sense of peace and purpose. Not a return to who I was, but the beginning of who I am now … albeit with a healthier gut.

A Note from Teena:

Thank you for reading my blog. I am a qualified Hairdresser, Beautician and Cosmetic Formulator with over 40years experience. I am the founder of True Botanix™ Skincare and owner of Tease Hair & Beauty Rooms in Tauranga, New Zealand.

The hormonal transition of midlife can begin years before menopause itself, with perimenopause symptoms often appearing gradually. This transition affects many far more than we once understood. As oestrogen begins to fluctuate and eventually stabilise, the nervous system, metabolism, and sleep patterns all respond to these changes.

During this time menopausal skin changes and often benefits from gentle support rather than aggressive treatments. Hydration, lipid replenishment, antioxidants, and barrier support become increasingly important as the skin adjusts to its new rhythm.

Through Tease Hair & Beauty Rooms I work with women navigating these changes through personalised skin analysis, advanced skin treatments and specialised programs.

If you would like guidance tailored to your skin, my TrueSkin Diagnostics online questionnaire provides a detailed report covering skincare ingredients, internal support, suggestions and professional treatment options.

For daily home care, many clients find support from products within the True Botanix™ range, particularly formulations designed to replenish lipids, hydration, and antioxidant protection.